Now that I have the journal aspect of this process down,
I guess it is time to start actually working out and eating better. Dumb. This
goes against my nature. Remember when you were young, and you and your friends
would talk about who you were in a past life? Everyone says things like… “I was a knight,
because I am can beat up anyone”, or “I was a princess, because I like pretty things”, or “I was
a 1920’s era gangster, because I don’t take shit from anyone”…
You know what I would say? “I was a minstrel who wore green tights
and dumb fucking green slippers with a red feather on the heel and skipped from
town to town telling tales and drinking wine from a dried bull scrotum that I
use as a wine decanter”. I was born to eat drink and be merry. Its in my blood.
This being said, I am pretty tired of the way my body feels.
New injuries spring up all the time, for absolutely no reason. Its funny, I was
at the gym today and ran into one of my trainers I work out with sometimes. She
runs a weight lifting club at the gym. The weight lifting club happens to be 90% women. All
90% of these women are 100% bad ass. I don’t personally have that gene that makes
me care when a woman out lifts me. I am not a goon. Bad ass is bad ass, and
these women are all bad ass. But at some point, when I am laying on the floor
purple faced and audibly moaning for god to kill me, a touch of misplaced pride kicks in and I start throwing injuries
at the wall to see what sticks. When I saw the trainer from the class walk in
today, she asked my how my back was feeling and my first thought was “Damn it,
what injury did I make up for her… what was I trying to get out of doing”… but
in this case it was a real injury… this made the conversation less awkward. Although
I did tune her out half way through what we both were saying. She is one of
those super in shape people who knows when fat people are lying to her. She
pretends she doesn’t know, but it is kind of belittling to everyone. She knows we
are lying, we know she knows, and yet we all just go along with it. She is too
nice to just say “Shut the fuck up dude… you aren’t injured, you are out of
shape and don’t want to do what it takes to get in shape”. I blame her… its
rude to just let me stand there and lie to her. I kind of wanted to push her
down. But she is way more bad ass that me, and I am sure the gym frowns on members getting their asses kicked by the trainers.
By the way, they frown on fights but some dip shit was working out in jeans
today and no one said a word. Jeans? Have some respect for yourself, sir.
But I digress. Back to the point. As I lose weight, the real
injuries have started to subside, and my need for the fake injuries has
subsided too. The whole point of working out is to become healthier. That doesn’t
just mean live longer… it means muscular skeletal health too. This has been a
huge factor in what diet plan I wanted to pick. I want to lose weight, retain
muscle, and fucking feel better. I have spent the last few months speaking to;
2 doctors, 3 dietitians, 2 trainers, and doing tons of reading, and I have found
that I see pros and cons to several diet plans, and no one can agree on any one
way to skin the cat. Or in this case, skin the fat man.
Keto, vegan, lean and green, Atkins, meal replacement, Jenny
Craig… But out of all I read, I have decided on Ketosis. The basic, dumbed down
starter kit science behind Ketosis is…
The body uses sugar for energy. When
you eat carbohydrates (grains, sugars, etc…) your body converts the sugars into
energy and stores the excess energy as fat. When you strip your blood stream of
these sugars, your body starts converting excess proteins into energy… but when
you starve your body of carbs, and limit the proteins you eat, your liver
starts creating ketones which are kind of fat seeking missiles. In order to get your body into this process, you need to eat a diet made up of 75% fats, 20% proteins, and 5% carbs (from veggies, not sugar or grain). When your body creates ketones, the ketones go
and collect stored fat to convert into energy. It takes a few weeks of carb starving to
get your body to start creating ketones and efficiently start burning body fat…
but once the changeover happened, I have felt like this diet has started to be
as advertised. I am starting ot lose weight, and I feel good being off sugar. I don’t have the high energy highs
and low energy lows. I feel more level throughout the day. I also don’t feel I
crave food as bad. During this I have also noticed that dairy does bad things
to me. Makes feel like garbage… so out it goes.
The only down side I have noticed to this diet, is I tend to
burn through energy pretty quick during my workout. Apparently my body will become
more and more efficient, and it needs to happen. The first half of my workout has
been drastically different than the second half. But I have now been to the gym
9 days in a row, and my body is feeling noticeably better. Removing sugar has
been huge for me.
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