Friday, May 25, 2018

Meth Prescription: Drastic Fat Requires Drastic Measures.



I think my doctor hates me. Hate is a strong word. Let us start again… I think my doctor hates me. Fuck it. The truth is the truth. He’s really nice to me, and accepts my appointments, and gives me great care. But I know he has no time for my antics. I told a story a few months ago about when he prescribed Testosterone replacement for me. He sat and tried to professionally tell me about why I needed the injections, what the lack of testosterone was doing to me, what to expect in terms of side effects… and all the while surfing in my sea of idiocy
                             “Will I get back acne?”
                             “Will I get ‘roid rage?”
                             “Will I grow beautiful jugs?”
                             “How glorious will my erections be?”
                             “Will I rip my house apart like Ben Affleck in that after school special?”

He simply looked at me and politely said “I don’t think you understand what is happening here”. And he went over the list of side effects and benefits for me again, knowing full well that the smile on my face was due to me imagining myself running the streets, punching out car windows, all while sporting the most awe inspiring erection, with my glorious bouncing cans (BTW, 2 months in, and I have yet to go on even one 'roid induced rampage… which is fucking bullshit). I know he thinks I did not notice how agitated and dejected he was by the end of our appointment, but HEY, I always notice his dejected and exhausted look.


During that appointment, he mentioned that I had another road block to health that I needed to monitor. I have a mutated MTHFR gene. Mutated? Gene? Of course this prompted more tomfoolery from me.
                             “Dr., are you telling me that I am a mother fucking Xmen?”

The silence produced by my question was deafening. After writing something in his note pad, which was probably mean spirited and would roundly be rejected by me, he eventually went on. He informed me that my body can’t process folic acid. He said that 1/3 of people suffer from this, all with different levels of impact… mostly related to the type of mutation. Apparently, I have a severe type, which means… fuck it, here is the professional explanation

What is MTHFR?
MTHFR is an enzyme that adds a methyl group to folic acid to make it usable by the body. The MTHFR gene produces this enzyme that is necessary for properly using vitamin B9. This enzyme is also important for converting homocysteine into methionine, which the body needs for proper metabolism and muscle growth and which is needed for glutathione creation . The process of methylation also involves the enzyme from the MTHFR gene, so those with a mutation may have trouble effectively eliminating toxins from the body. Folic acid not only can not be utilized to complete this metabolic chain, but can not be properly processed by the body and will be stored by fat cells as a toxin.
Side effects of a faulty MTHFR gene can include: Heart disease, anxiety, toxicity, chronic pain, strokes, fat storage. And folic acid is vital in brain development of gestating babies during pregnancy.

Of course, I had only heard of folic acid in terms of pregnancy. So hearing that my Xmen power is that I cannot effectively carry a baby to full gestation was kind of a letdown. Everything my doctor had explained to me was lost as I mourned my missed opportunity to be a super hero. I do know that he prescribed a cure… well, a pill and a process. The “pill” is methylfolate... which is a naturally occurring form of the man made folic acid. My body CAN process methylfolate, and this will allow my body to reverse the impact of not being able to complete the above metabolic process. The “process” is to avoid foods that are labeled “enriched”. When bread, rice, raw grains, cereal are “enriched”, most likely they are enriched with FOLIC ACID, which is what my body cant process. Because my body can’t process this folic acid, my fat cells will pull that folic acid in and store it as a toxin. Not only is my body unable to utilize the folic acid to complete the metabolic process, but my body will also store the folic acid as a toxin.

The best part of this fun fact, is that I didn’t absorb any of it during my doctors visit. Oh sure, at his suggestion I purchased the methylfolate. However, my extent of "using" the supplement was to call all my friends and tell them my doctor prescribed meth, and that I was an Xmen. To make this even worse, I set up auto delivery of my supplements and was receiving them on regular intervals, only to place it on a shelf and never use it.

Then I had a moment of kismet. I was sitting at the pool with some friends, and the topic of the mutated MTHFR gene came up (as I am sure it does for everyone on a daily basis). Apparently, both of my friends that I was speaking with, have this issue too. Both of these individuals have had struggles with anxiety and found relief in the methylfolate supplement. One of these friends said he was ready to begin taking anti-anxiety medications but found that the methylfolate helped stabilize his anxiety… and he said “I feel more comfortable and more like myself than at any point in my life”. The other gentlemen added that not only did he stabilize his anxiety with methylfolate, but that he also noticed the increased weight loss effects of his exercise programs.

Needless to say I have spent the past 48 hours researching this topic. I am absolutely going to start adding in the supplements and avoiding anything with “folic acid”. This may or may not be something I am having issues with in my life. This is hard for me to measure. I am one of the least anxious people I know, and I cant be 100% sure of the role this lack of completion of the metabolic chain is having in my weight issues. However, I don’t see a down side to cleaning the folic acid from my diet and utilizing the benefits of the methylfolate. This is a “pro’s v con’s” scenario. I don’t see a down side to eliminating enriched foods from my diet, and the possible upside is huge.

As I type this post, I know that the reader will draw two plausible conclusions about my progress. 
1)      Eddie is making growth in terms of understanding that biology and genetics play a huge role in personal health.
a.       CORRECT. Genetics play a pretty universally accepted part in a person’s predisposition for cancer, heart disease, diabetes… why is the focus of weight loss so heavily believed to be just habit related for fat people. Fatties are sold pigeon holed remedies and we eat them up. Diet plans, meal replacements, books, ab rollers… how much money will we waste on these things before realizing that the first step in losing weight, is using science and studying our minds and bodies to determine what the cause of our weight issues are.  There is no “one fix”… we need to treat this as a complete rewiring of our habits.. study our minds, bodies, family histories, and personal habits. Humans have unique body chemistry's, and we need to understand our unique biological make up before we can accurately repair our issues. This is not a matter of smashing our way through barriers… this is a process of understanding why our barriers exist and permanently removing them with calculation.
2)      Eddie is learning to focus on his targets and the importance of paying attention to professionals and utilizing everyone’s time and efforts to the best of my abilities. Have less of a dreamers mentality. 
a.       NOPE! Not at all the case. My brain works the way it works. I enjoy the benefits I receive from my dreamer mentality. I feel the struggle to allow my dreamer mentality to coexist with intellectual focus is a battle worth fighting. I never want to lose my inner Lane Meyer (if you don't understand this reference, you are whats wrong with this country). I am willing to tolerate some lack of efficiency, to enjoy the fun derived from my wandering mind. 

So remember boys and girls, if you want to be lean/healthy/and anxiety free, study your body, explore your mind for reasons that may be behind why you act outside your best interest (understand why you have an unhealthy relationship with food), and make sure to take your meth twice a day.

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